Research consistently shows the more people value materialistic aspirations and goals the lower their life satisfaction and happiness is and the fewer pleasant emotions they experience day to day.
Depression, anxiety and substance abuse tend to be higher among people who are in pursuit of happiness, especially the type of happiness we experience through our senses, the happiness that comes instantly.
So what causes people to chase this type of success and happiness? Well you may not like this but studies show that people focus on material possessions when they feel insecure. Yep that’s right, when they feel insecure ~ OUCH
So perhaps next time you experience an uncomfortable emotion such as stress, overwhelm, embarrassment or anger try doing something different other than gratifying yourself with a new top or a bar of chocolate, it might taste good but ultimately the emotion doesn’t disappear. You are in a vicious cycle which there is no awareness, you just do and carry on being busy, living life on auto-pilot and never normally stop to consider another way (until your forced to).
One of my many favourite teachers Dr Robert Holden coaches successful people all over the world and interestingly enough he quoted this: “The most successful and happy people I know are good at making time for reflection and inspiration. They stop regularly and go deeper, to gain perspective, to hold a vision, to receive direction”.
Ask yourself this, honestly how much time do you make in your day for inspiration, meditation or reflection. How much time goes towards the vision for your life? I can tell you I never made time for this and I ended up in pain, emotional and spiritual pain chasing someone else’s vision of success and happiness, the one the media tells me I have to have in order to be worthy or feel like I am enough. In the end we shut off from the world but the problem and we decide to numb ourselves but we cant selectively numb emotions and we end up numbing them all and when we do there is no room for joy, or love, or contentment so we start to look outside to fill the void. Most of us are looking outside in the hope it will heal the inside but until you are willing to see your patterns this will continue and I think this why we start to feel like every day is groundhog day.
You may be at a place in your life where you feel like you cant go on living like this anymore and this is a great place to be, trust me transformation takes place the day you decide enough is enough, don’t wait until life forces you to change decide today you want to make the change, your future self will thank you for it.